Funny things kids say

mine just tell me / intimate what a sad loser I am... sadly one did it before he got his birthday money. Big mistake!!
Important lesson in life for him!..Proper Fatherhood!....
 
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My niece told the checkout girl in a very busy sainsbury that her mum had been eating her dads penis last night .............................. She meant peanuts:ROFLMAO:
 
When our kids were young and we went to friends or they came to us with their young children, the kids used to love asking us if we wanted coffee because I taught them to say “You for coffee?” But I made it sound like 'Youfuckoffee'. They still do it now and they are in their thirties!

Another time, around the time the world cup was on, Walkers brought out some crisp flavours named after players - they had salt 'n' Lineker, smokey Beckham, cheese and Owen and I think some others. Anyway, at a birthday party my wife was at for one of her friends 6 year old daughter, the kids were making up names of other possible crisp flavours using World Cup footballers names. Most of them were silly but our daughter loudly said “I know, salty Seamen”. My wife said you could hear a pin drop!
 
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Although I was too young to remember, my mom tells the tale of her catching me dropping the F bomb as a nipper.
She threatened to wash my mouth out with soap, if I did it again.
Apparently, the threat worked. For a while.

She then tells of hearing me, cheerfully pushing a toy car back and forth along the window cill, to the tuneful tones of "f##k, f##k, f##k", over and over.

Out came the washing up liquid and brush, me in a headlock, and lots of bubbles and tears :cautious::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:
 
My mates little son toddles up to his nan one day n says' I don't like cun*s nanny'....................poor nanny was a bit shocked for a few seconds before deciding to enquire further, turns out the dear little fellow was referring to currants........................Brilliant!!
 
My 6 year old girl was helping me do the garden Saturday.
We were nipping away (amongst other plants) at I think are dog roses. I said be careful to pick up by the ends as the stems were had prickles.

After a while she said have you got any pricks you need me to deal with...

There are a few I could think of
 
Told my 3 year old granddaughter on Thursday we would take her to the zoo on Sunday.
She asked "How many sleeps is that grandad?"
"That's 2 sleeps and 3 breakfasts before we come and pick you up."
She toddles off and comes back with her bowl and a packet of single cereal she has for breakfast. "Why are you having your breakfast now?" I asked.
She replied, "I'm going to have my 3 breakfasts now, then I'm going to have 2 naps and then we can go to the zoo today instead."
 
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