how bad does a house have to be before you wont work in it?

[Brigadier]

Years ago, I had to go and audit a lad on a site job.

Church Stretton, in a cul-de-sac.

You could tell what sort of place it was, as a very-dishevelled Santa was hanging by his ankle, on the front of the house. In July.


Chain-smoking scrawnbag woman was the tenant, the fag smoke barely masking the stink from the two huge and out-of-control GSDs.

The place was awful.


Auditee, trying to be pleasant, lay on the kitchen floor and was trying to take a sample of floor tile from under the unit (the kickboards were all missing, so it made a degree of sense to do this). Especially since the floor tiles were lifting too, under the unit.

As the auditee, who was lying of the floor with his cheek on the ground, was reaching his arm under the cupboard, Fag Ash Lil said

"The tiles are coming up because me dogs p!ss there."


The look on the lad's face was priceless

 

[jurassic sparkk]

Went in a domestic property once and there was rats everywhere. I told the client I'll only work here if I'm allowed to wear my shoes inside and refuse to whatever food they make!

 

[Brigadier]

The place in Leeds where the tenant told me that they hadn't cleaned up as they "were waiting for the works to be completed".

Judging by the ground-in filth everywhere, I can only surmise that they'd been waiting for a number of decades...........

 

[mattylad]

I try to tell the wife that my house is so bad I won't work in it.

Sometimes works, sometimes does not.