Tips for a single life.

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As I'm sure many people have been through the experience of living a single life (me twice !! (but not now :( )), as a D.I.Y ( ;) ) website I think we should help all newcomers to the world of freedom to any hints and tips to ease them through, what is, a very traumatic time ( You know the case scenario, stereo system, album/cd collection, 3 bin bags of clothes, why never a suitcase ? the buggers booked a holiday, thats why ! ).

Anyway, four tips to start with.

1) When you get your damp jeans back from the launderette, hang them out straight away, waistband up, the weather will remove 99.9% of creases (sadly not curry stains :rolleyes: )

2) Buy yourself an 8 piece dinner service, then you only have to wash up once a week, but if you forget, you still got a clean plate !

3) Rent digs by an off licence and above a take away, you'll keep your licence and get discounted grub from your landlord (the chippy owner).

4) Always, but always phone Ma on a Saturday, Sunday lunch is then pre-booked. Don't forget though, that if you "score", to phone and say your car has broken down, even if you haven't got one (Say you got it cheap but scrapped it 'cos no good).
 
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I'm a single bloke, but 2 of 4 there don't apply:

Laundry/Ironing: I guess I may be in the minority here but I love doing my ironing. Get it out of the tumble dryer, whack a good album on (I recommend Alanis Morrisette) and iron to your hearts content!

Washing up: again, a good slice of music will get you through. The secret is not to let it build up, then it becomes a chore. Wash up after every meal and it's nothing.

As for the other two:

Live near the off-license: Well, if I did, I might not be in the poo I am now!

Phoning "Ma": you can only imagine the conversation I had with her a couple of days ago, suffice to say I don't think I'm top of the xmas card list!
 
I think that's perhaps why I feel a bit sad now. Many years ago, I used to live on my todd in a lovely 2 bed 18th century cottage. Nice to look at , leaked like a seive, but it was within 1 minutes walking of :-

1 Off licence
3 Pubs
1 chinese takeaway
2 Indian Takeaways
1 small supermarket
1 excellent butcher
1 tip top italian restaurant.
2 Petrol stations
2 banks

Sigh, those were the days :(

Just remembered, used to park the car in the drive on Friday night, and it never moved until Monday morning.

I'm going to have a drink and sulk now.
 
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ninebob, you need to live near a fag shop not an off licence! :D
 
ninebob, you need to live near a fag shop not an off licence!

:eek:

I use the "hang clothes up straight from the machine" trick, I never iron. Plus it helps to go to the gym and/or eat pies cos then you can wear stretch fit t-shirts - no ironing required!

I used to keep to the weekly washing up regime... then I got a dishwasher. Brilliant!

I considered getting a cleaning lady, but then I realised that would be far too lazy. If you have a girlfriend, "accidentally" leave getting in the shower until she arrives. That way, by the time you get out you will find your living room magically tidy! Also, if you "accidentally" leave your clothes round theirs, they have a tendency to be returned washed and ironed. That whole nesting instinct thing again ;)

Oh, here's one. Every time you take a number 2, pour a quantity of bleach down after flushing. You will never have to brush again! But you do go through a lot more bleach. 'Specially if you live near an Indian.

Scoby, interesting you bring this up so close to Valentine's day ;)
 
Adam:
if you "accidentally" leave your clothes round theirs, they have a tendency to be returned washed and ironed.
Don't place too much importance on this though. Remember the old saying,
"Marriage is an expensive way of getting your laundry done for nothing"
 
Just thought, we have a cleaner --- for the last 20 yrs !! But I do not live alone :rolleyes: Coals and Newcastle come to mind ! :rolleyes:

70's Lived in a big flat -- shared with two students from the local (as in 200 metres away) domestic science college ;) ;) .... Bu##er !! they were into fashion, not household chores .. Ho hum.. the trouser alterations were brill tho', as was the permanent invite to the cheap, totty filled, college bar .... more like a rodeo, where one went to 'cut one out of the herd' ;) ;)
 
You see, that's where I made my first mistake. I went to Imperial College. Which is like a leper colony for male geeks.

My sister made the same mistake, she went to Royal Holloway, which is like a prison for hot chicks. Yet no-one from the former ever seems to consider dropping in on the latter. :eek:
 
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Hanging out the washing on the 'getting some' Singleton's line. ;)
 
You can use them twice if you turn them inside out ;)
 
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