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A friend of mine had a hamster once, and its bum kind of "fell off". It was quite distressing, more so for the hamster I imagine.

Would this be a good thing sometimes?

When I got circumcised and paid the surgeon, I told him he could keep the tip.

If you had a super power what would it be and why?

Try as I might and shake it off inside, I cannot help some petrol spilling out of the nozzle onto the floor as I put it back in the holder. As well as the fire hazard, the waste upsets me.

Yep, she is Polish.

S'alright, dunt bother me. How's your brother's tuna business?

Reminds me of that episode of Friends where Ross and Mike (I think) are so bored with each other they end up looking up what makes lager different from beer different from ale different from stout etc.

You might be getting confused with ninebob (there's a clue in his name), but I don't mind.

Dunno, it's a long way to Poland.

What about them coming over and shagging our women though?

A slap round the face.

Bet he's got a PS3 or a Wii or an X-Box360. Am I right, or am I right?

25.093 Read it and weep.

Yes mild is weaker than bitter. The pub I used to work in served a "Mickey Mouse", half a bitter and half a mild in the same glass. However, I got something different when I asked one of the barmaids for a "Donald Duck".

Yes I know that also, but for such a knowledgeable bloke, are you sure you have those ethnic groups' names right? But you should like them - they systematic and they make sense! Amylene? You mean pentene, right?

The IUPAC name is ethanol. Other humans have evolved differently? Could you explain that? You mean because of their low tolerance to ethanol? I know that! I have seen monkeys and birds getting drunk off fermented fruit. PS. I like the way you always use 3 emoticons. :D :D :D

Gordon Brown, Prime Minister of the UK: Cristina Kirchner, President of Argentina:

:lol:

Yeah - the same brand of pick n' mix sweets are £0.49/100gr at Wilkinson's, but £1.80/100gr at Odeon. Phew!