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Tuppence or Flange. Whichever works best for you......

Did you ? Sorry then, I think I must have had it all on its head. No offence meant...

Nothing much, only that the two of you weren't exactly best pals - Now take off those angry eyes....

D'Oh ! Probably the worst person to see it, saw it..... :D

DELETED - Thought better of it. May not help the situation.....

I'd recommend Softus's number 3. I've got something similar in my contract as a standard term, but have always been under the impression that it is pretty much unenforcable under European freedom-of-trade rules, or somesuch. The extent to which you will be competing etc., is always going...

No - She was a blonde :wink: It would have been about 16 years ago, so I have no idea. Just down from the cinema though, right ? Pop round to Maumoniats and pick me up a couple of Samosas, please...

And lets not forget, inflammable means flammable...

In Selby, we have a swing bridge and a light up sign at the end of its road, which tells us when the Swing Bridge is 'closed'. But the bridge is actually open, when its 'closed' (and closed when its 'open'). This makes sense in my head... :oops:

I think I used to live near there - Are you on the roof of the Royal Park ? (EDIT: Scrap that - I've worked out exactly where you are - I may even have done it with a girl called Wendy in the very room the picture is taken from, in my student days :D )

I'm not posting a picture of my member for anyone......

I Have !! (Kind of) I have a business line for work, for which I pay BT's £4.50 a bill surcharge for wanting to actually read my bill before they whip the money out of my account. And I have business broadband through BT, which gets billed separately, and for which I also get to pay £4.50...

Keep your nose out - No-one will thank you for interfering. Just be there as someone for him to let it all out too Incidentally, I have to ask.......They haven’t expressed their love for each other in the way adults do since the conception. .........Do you mean a bunch of flowers from BP ?

As has been mentioned, its just to cause trouble. Start a chain e-mail like this off, and even if you get 100 people feeling less sunnily disposed towards Muslims than before, because Ken Livingstone is building them a 100 million pound Mosque out of taxpayers money, then its job is done....

Don't know if its true or not, but my first instinct would be to say that its a load of cobblers started off by someone wanting to cause trouble. I don't think any taxpayers money has ever gone to building religious building (or at least not for a few hundred years), so can't imagine why it...

Um....you do realise that the receipt will have your adress on, and you'll end up signing for it when its delivered, so you'll get short shrift from the PO when trying to claim. Believe me, BOB, if you ever manage to think up a real scam then its going to be a pretty f***witted one that even a...

....and let's not forget Marti Pellow burping after the first line of 'Angel Eyes'

His real name is Joszef, and he did some cheap plumbing for RichardP. :?:

Have just heard that to counter charges of racism, arrangements have been made to donate all of Bernard's old clothes to Oxfam. The search is now on for a 30-Stone Ethiopian....

'Tis a tricky one. We shouldn't not give someone deserving a knighthood just because of the possible reaction but, personally, I can't see any reason why he should have been given a knighthood (and he's by no means alone there). Therefore, given that the reaction is entirely predictable, I...