He has not got any proper working drawings for the builder to build to or the engineer to design for.But the OP did get some drawings done. I don't think many people doing this for the first time would have appreciated the need for sectional drawings for the fixings. He relied on SE advice that has proved not to be helpful advice.
I accept the outcome is part and parcel of project managing your own building works, which is what the OP seems to have done. However I think you are being a bit harsh myself as the OP did make an effort to take advice from the SE. I am not saying it is the SE's fault but it wasn't forseeable by the OP either.
This is not a straightforward box on the back of the house, but involves more complex construction, methods and solutions.
Unless there is a specialist tie arrangement required for the steel beams, then an engineer may not need to specify anything as it will be normal building standards how to tie in. Builders who don't know the correct way to tie to steel should not be building. Wall startes are not the correct tie - the manufacturers specifically mention these are for simple masonry to masony connections, and the product's BBA certification state this too.
It's frustrating to read about all these things which have gone on as they are not the things that should be happening and being posted about for advice, but are pretty basic stuff. Fair play for the OP for having a go, but this all seems to be relying on fortune rather than planning, and the OP is already finding out at his cost that things are not working out as they should.
We have not even begun to hear about the more typical technical issues that tend to crop up. Ok, the builder may well turn out to be more competant and more helpful than they appear to be up to now, but it all seems to be on a wing and a prayer which is irritating the sensible part of my brain.