TAX Returns...

[mildmanneredjanitor]

OK, so I missed the deadline...

bored, pizzed off and struggling to make head or tail out of these forms.

So tell me a joke to make me smile

 

[breezer]

tax needn't be taxing?

i hear that when they buried percy thrower, they had to bury him quite deep, otherwise he would have come up again next year

 

[mildmanneredjanitor]

tax needn't be taxing?

That's not funny... I could punch Adam Heart Davies right now!

P.S. After seeing you've relocated again, in suddenly occurred to me that I was displaying the wrong location!

 

[breezer]

Adam Heart-Davies, he is My local hero (untill next time)

ps percy thrower was a gardener

 

[mildmanneredjanitor]

Adam Heart-Davies, he is My local hero (untill next time)

Yes, really enjoy his programmes - but he's a professor, tax returns are probably just as easy as breathing to him!

ps percy thrower was a gardener

So, have you got a Blue Peter Badge then???

 

[breezer]

i wasn't sure, (i am now) but we have spelt his name wrong (no e, in heart, he spells it hart)

just incase any one wonders who we are refering to its

him

you may also want to see here

 

[shaggy]

mmj:

bored, pizzed off and struggling to make head or tail out of these forms.

Sorry to be serious with no jokes but I've just done mine on-line for the first time. It was dead easy and it calculates the total tax due immediately, tells you what your payment is by 31 Jan and also the payment on account. You can print-off the return for reference.
This is the easiest way yet. You must register first and it takes a few weeks so don't leave it to last moment. You can pay on-line as well.

 

[AdamW]

What is Inland Revenue speak for "You must sacrifice your first-born to the name of Gordon"?

I have a joke for you:

Taxman minces into a bar...














Ouch, it was an iron bar, made of sh*t and barbed wire and razor blades. With a dog.

I like Adam H-D, not just cos he has such a cool first name. I think he conveys science in a way that makes it accessible to all. Even though he is a... ch*mist. Decimetres indeed.

 

[BruisedThumb]

My father was a scenic carpenter at the BBC TV Centre at White City.

He told me that they had a greenhouse on the TV Centre roof to grow stuff for the Percy Thrower programme.

For the actual broadcasts, they used to put up an identical greenhouse in the studio. It had a scenery flat (back-drop) behind it so it looked as though it was in a garden. When Percy went in to the greenhouse, like a good gardener, he'd take off his jacket and hang it on a hook on the inside of the door.

Thing was, the studio greenhouse had no glass in it because the reflections of the studio lights wouldn't have been good for the cameras.

Oh, well, I thought it was funny.

 

[breezer]

like most things on tv, they are not what they appear to be.

mashed spuds, or shaving foam is sometimes used in adds as "ice cream" as it doesnt melt