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What happens if you try to run a diesel car on 28 sec central heating oil (apart from a spell in Wormwood Scrubs)?

Useful info, wilhelm. I somehow doubt they'd want to send one of their guys out at 8pm on a Friday evening though!

As in "Are you a pole vaulter?" "Nein, I am Austrian. But how did you know my name?"

To be honest I'm not sure. It lurks somwehere in the direct debit payments. Do you think they're a ripoff? I went for it because the missus threatened divorce if we ran out AGAIN over Christmas (only joking but you get the idea). Also the eyeglass column on the tank is so clouded you can't see...

Street? Valve? Sinatra? Too cryptic for this simple soul. Could you explain? If their boiler servicing is as good as their oil delivery, I'll stick with homespun methods (or call you out). Thanks for the tip.

Please do not lower the tone of this forum with racist comments. Anyway, this is a myth. Didn't you know that the Portugese have the longest and Poles the the thickest? Regards Fernandez Wolenska

Maybe the guy wanted a bung. How about £10 per mm?

Become a CORGI inspector.

Ran out of oil last night. Total Butler (aka Total Blunder) hadn't informed us that the "Signalman" oil level monitor, for which we pay them good money, was not working. They were apologetic. Surprise, surprise, boiler wouldn't fire when tank was refilled. Serious airlock in oil pipe took me...

That wasn't a dig, for heaven's sake. I was merely stating that Chris had accidentally sidelined the entire oil sector - therefore you as its eponymous representative - by saying that all boilers have a gas valve. Fawning, if you like. And which "minority views" are being "dismissed"? I see...

To aid understanding, suggest ... because some of the water vapour in the flue gases condenses back to the liquid state (water), releasing heat (latent heat of vaporisation) that would otherwise be wasted. Tell me if I'm being even more of a nuisance than usual.

That's it, Chris! The "someone above" was of course Oilman.

Don't understand, Chris. The statement, as it stands, says a gas valve is a key control on any boiler. Oil? Solid fuel?

I'm surprised at you, ChrisR and Oliman. You usually give the impression of a) wanting to educate your readers and b) encouraging self-help, but are now knocking Chrishutt for doing just that. Unless I've got it completely wrong, contributors to this forum spend a significant part of their...

Never believe anyone who quotes Health and Safety as a "reason".

Yesterday I replaced the PCB in a Mira Sport 10.8Kw. It cost about £75, almost the same price as this (dunno if it's any good): http://www.screwfix.com/app/sfd/cat/pro.jsp?cId=100595&ts=36588&id=61785 It saved about £125 on the price of a new Mira but did involve several hours' fannying...

All agreed then?

This is becoming an obsession. Inspired by Oilman's revelation of the second port, why don't we just attach a pipe to it, shove it through the back wall and fit a relief valve on the end? Chris - if armageddon came, wouldn't even a 3 bar valve open before sufficient pressure built up to...

Thought you'd like that "engineering solution", Oilman. Chris - good point about freezing. Could happen if the house was unoccupied, as it always is when we go on our winter getaway to the Bahamas. :cry: At least this solution would be dead easy to carry out. Maybe I'll just grow a beard...

Oilman, your earlier mention of the boiler's second port (thanks for the reminder) has given me another wheeze. As I may have mentioned :lol: we are about to convert to a conventional flue. This involves sticking a 4in liner up a 6in diameter chimney. So clap you eyes on this and weep...