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Justin Passing

Justin Passing

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Coming out of my problems about my wife, I realised there's nowhere on this blokey forum for personal matters, to unload, or seek help with.
Support isn't always with screws and a bracket.


NOT for anything contentious, or comparing with starving Africans or immigrants.
Any gender or age, but it's about YOUR problems or those of a close family member perhaps.
Obviously no medical advice, but bits of info or suggestions could be very useful for looking into.
 
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From many of the general comments on this forum, I don't think that this is really the best to 'open up' to. Kudos to those that have.
If anonymous posting was permitted then maybe.
And I'm sure would be very useful and welcomed by many.
 
You are anonymous.

I'll let you into a secret, my real name isn't Justin Passing.
As far as I'm aware, because we see it all the time. you can have more than one username.
You can eg go to Google, create a new email say [email protected], and in the forum
if you type @monty it gives you a list of all the names which start with that.
You can do it in the Search box too, you get this:

so there's definitely no MontyPython
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Security Services or perhaps Google could find you I daresay, but they're not that interested. Even an IP address doesn't identify an individual.
From another forum I was involved with, the Forum administrators may have your email address, IP address, but little or no more.
Search for username starting rr or Rr , it only shows you and two others.

.

.
 
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I had a better day.
Long story short, I bumped into the son of a guy I was at university with, whom I haven't seem for at least a couple of years.
Hi is a senior cardiac consultant. He was at the same hospital, but has just moved. He can log on and check all the records.
He asked me in to his house. I'll call him Ahmed
He's carefully gone through all the things I've been told, and checked who told me, how reliable they would be, and given a different picture.
For example, my wife's bypassed kidneys might be scarred forever, useless even, but it's far more llikely that's they'll get to be nearly as healthy as before the "insult" more or less as soon as needed. You only need one.
He's gone through the timeline of what occurred, and come up with a "something over 30%" figure for"hopefully" heart function once it has been given support for long enough.
Normal is 55% upwards, so for a normal older person, 30% isn't so bad.

Cardiology has half a dozen different consutants whose specialisms overlap. One might be a cardiac anaesthetist, another a cardiac interventionist, another a rhythms specialist. All cardiac consultants. I had no idea.

Sure this process may take weeks, but the outlook is nowhere near as dire as I had been told.
At one point I had been called at 4am, "You'd better come in, your wife is gravely ill" by a female consultant I saw today who is delighted to see she is much less bad now. She was all smiles. Sure, my wife couldn't survive if they pulled all the tubes now, but that's not unusual.

So instead of the reasonable assumption that she was going to get worse and die, the position has flipped.

One thing which helps - educate yourself. For example the "LFT's" you always hear them call for on Casualty, ("U's and E's and LFT's ) are very useful in detecting early/ mid/late/ ongoing/recovery reactions by the liver which sorts your blood out. Some spike massively as soon as there's trauma, some are slower. How far they get up, and when they start to drop, are useful indicators. ChatGPT rise gives you simple tables to judge the numbers. and explain the trends.

Thinking about it, even more basic than that, why a failing heart increases the fluid in the lungs and generally, causing oedema (swelling) eg in hands and ankles. If you don't know, look it up. Ask AI.
 
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Justin Passing said:
Sure this process may take weeks, but the outlook is nowhere near as dire as I had been told.
Click to expand...
Its really good to hear that there is more hope than you first imagined.

the roller coaster of emotions is really so draining, I can imagine part of you wants to be reassured and positive and part of you is scared to believe it.


We are lucky to have a universal health service, but my experience in recent years is that the communication is patchy, inconsistent and sometimes not professional. So is really good for you to get the opportunity to have the expert opinion of somebody outside of the normal NHS channel that the ordinary punter gets to see.
 
It's over. Peacefully. Unsurprisingly, an infection added to the mix.
On max support, BP creeping down, the heart couldn't keep beating.

My wife was on facebook. I don't know much about it, but the account is being flooded by unknown contacts of contacts of......

Somewhat similar with Whatsapp.

Her GP had sent a query asking for feedback. She has what I could tell her, plus what A@E recorded. She is keen to support a claim for fatal negligence.
Serious question, is there a FB group for that? The details in this case appear to make the claim hard to resist.
Again, try a couple of AI's. Microsoft Copilot is being driven by medical inquiries, and getting good at medical. ChatGPT is consistently very good too.
I could use a no-win no fee mob I suppose, but I CBA to do it myself. Claim outcome estimated at a few 100k.

The life is worth £16k, but add
(my life expectancy less current age) x (her pension income per annum). tose, inserting random numbers of 20years at 20k, give
£416,000. That wouldn't change much but if someone will go for it free, why not.

I'm getting a load of antibiotic side effects like skin sloughing off, following on from the arm ops, just as a niggle.
 
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Sorry for your loss Justin.

Regarding a claim, check your home insurance - if you have legal expenses cover you may be able to make a claim. However, take care of yourself for now and don’t rush into anything.
 
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