What a week I'm having...

[Shytalkz]

Cor blimey.

Dumped (for the 869th time) by the other half, apropos of nothing. "This really is the final final final absolutely final time, I'm never taking you back, you never gave into my demands...". Never love a very pretty, but psychotic, woman with an overbearing father whom she adores and who in turn treats her like a little princess, it only ends in disaster. For nine long years I've been kidding myself that I was "the special one". Certifiable one, more like. Heyho.

Now I've just lost my first small claims court case, for £800. Bit lax with the paperwork, it has to be said, got trashed by the lawyer representing the client. But, did get in a brief dig when the lawyer asked me if he would be expected to understand the drawing. I said no, he said why, I said because you're a lawyer....

Still, on the back of the first, I really don't give a flying ferk about the second. Sh*t happens.

 

[joe-90]

Never mind. Take up guitar playing and live alone like I do.

 

[Shytalkz]

Thank f*ck for keeping my own property throughout. At least I haven't got to go through that palaver.

And I'm getting a new car, so it ain't all rain clouds overhead

 

[joe-90]

And I'm getting a new car,

A loan again - naturally.

 

[Bahco]

Plenty of single women out there if you can learn how to get chatting to them. When I was on the hunt I found a lot of when were friendly once the conversation had been initiated.

Have a look HERE and you will soon get over her!

 

[JohnD]

I think he said he wants an ugly one this time

 

[joe-90]

Women like nice but naughty men with a sense of humour. 'Laff em into bed'.

Try one of Joe's made up chat up lines.

"Hi my name's Joe and I play the guitar."

"Oh do you?"

Yes. My names Joe but they call me Rolf Harris'

"Oh why do they call you Rolf Harris"?

(punch line) "Cuz I'm very big down under". Keep a straight face and they won't know what to make of it.

Then you can start singing 'Jake the Peg'

"Would you like to see my equipment?"

When they finally realise that you are a fungi - you're in.

 

[Deluks]

Sounds like familiar territory for me.

OOI, what were her 'demands' ?

Roll on the 870th time! or

 

[Shytalkz]

Demands:

Live together: did that, took me for £80k within 2 years, moved out, wanted me back, went back, dumped, went back etc...so, the "solution" was that I kept my place from which to work, lived at hers
Marriage: required for any chance of getting back together (every time!), thus far avoided with some deft footwork, although, ironically after 11 months of reasonable calm, I was almost at the point of throwing my lot in with her and marrying her
Work less: fair enough
Play more: fair enough
Sell all my properties and buy something jointly together (again)
Pay less attention to my two kids, especially the druggie one, and grandkid and give more, preferably it all, to her
Put her at the top of my tree, above the kids and anyone else I know and care for
Do more housework at hers and run my place all on my own, no input from her
Stop letting her down (how I'm not sure, it's never specific as to how I have done so)
Be more supportive: by that she actually means give in to all her demands and not attempt to either ignore them, or negotiate

For my own remnants of sanity, there can be no 870th time, although I waver wildly from that pov from hour to hour. She has been, as you can probably imagine, just like my Ducati: exotic, expensive, but prone to break down and dump me by the roadside at a moment's notice. But, I'm knocking 50 and can well do without being put through the kind of relationship that we all have in our teenage years. How I have not put her through the window on occasions is a testimony to the frontal lobotomy I had nine years ago at the time of meeting her...

 

[Shytalkz]

That methodology, Joe, is precisely how I ended up with her in the first place!

 

[Shytalkz]

And I'm getting a new car,

A loan again - naturally.

You're really Tim, aren't you?!!!

 

[Deluks]

All women have some of those traits, to a certain extent. You seem to have landed the one with 'em all! She's the pattern book.

All explained here



ps, choccy biccy with your name on it in the floors/stairs/loft section.

 

[Shytalkz]

My God, that is her...!

 

[noseall]

women are from Venus men are from Mars.

ho hum.

 

[Blasphemous]

Women like nice but naughty men with a sense of humour. 'Laff em into bed'.

Try one of Joe's made up chat up lines.

"Hi my name's Joe and I play the guitar."

"Oh do you?"

Yes. My names Joe but they call me Rolf Harris'

"Oh why do they call you Rolf Harris"?

(punch line) "Cuz I'm very big down under". Keep a straight face and they won't know what to make of it.

Then you can start singing 'Jake the Peg'

"Would you like to see my equipment?"

When they finally realise that you are a fungi - you're in.

Ahhh! Now we know why you...

Never mind.... live alone like I do.

Sorry Joe couldn't resist. You're a wiser man than I am with my Mortgage, Wife and Son!!! I have had grey hair for years. My mate (who is the same age as me...OLD!), lives alone, has no kids and comes and goes as he pleases... And he ain't got a grey hair in sight!!!