Diagnostic tool for boiler repair technicians

[bernardgreen]

A glass ball is an important tool in troubleshooting. With it it is possible to determine technical problems immediately and accurately without detailed description. It also enjoys great popularity among clairvoyants and astrologers.

Regular maintenance work (calibration, etc.) is required by by qualified calibrators at Blockberg or Vlaardigen to ensure the proper functioning of the equipment. This has a negative impact on the general availability of this tool due to the long shipping and waiting times. Thus, in the absence of a glass ball, it is urgently necessary to precisley describe technical problems including the name of the boiler model and the symptoms.

 

[oilboffin]

Do wotttt

 

[Steelmasons]

I've been asking for one of these for years.

 

[Dan Robinson]

Do wotttt

Either senility is finally taking over or Berny is trying to get in on Tony's comedy act. With similar results.

 

[vulcancontinental]

I think you could put it down to imitation being the sincerest form of flattery Dan. You have a vitrtual underling.

 

[Doggit]

You see, that's why it isn't working Bernard, you've got the wrong equipment. It should be a crystal ball if used by a clairvoyant, and not a glass one, which is used by fairground fortune tellers. And astologers do it with a computer nowadays.

 

[Dan Robinson]

I think you could put it down to imitation being the sincerest form of flattery Dan. You have a vitrtual underling.

Or perhaps he's finally understanding someone the professionals frustrations?

 

[mcmoby69]

Crystal balls have been replaced by Google.

It was a quiet take over and wasn't publicised widely.

Unfortunately the majority of the planet accepted this change without too much fuss.
Their devices tell them when to get up, how many steps they've done, what they have to do that day, what time it is what day it is ,,,,,, blah blah blah.

So how to fix a bog is easy, their phone tells em how to do it..

Boiler fix needed? Google it, can't be ****ing that hard can it? The main appliance that is a bomb in a box.

More people spend more money on their pets than on their boiler. Mental.

 

[Doggit]

Crystal balls have been replaced by Google.

Trust me, googles good, but not that good. It's replaced the glass ones, but not the crystal ones.......yet.

But you did a brilliant piece, so you get a "like" for it

 

[Mikefromlondon]

Bernard, you don't need that, you have online manuals and flow charts, that navigates you like a satnav, you just program your destination (boiler make model etc) and press start navigation, you will need a satellite (multimeter) and if you reach a yes, turn right, if No, turn left, or if neither then go straight past a round about and follow further instructions, if you reach your destination stop, if not or you get neither yes or No, turn around and follow further instructions, if you keep going in circles and after an hour you do not see any more signs, or keep seeing the same signs, stop, replace your circuit board! job done.

 

[mcmoby69]

Glass balls (crystal balls) are amazing.
They tell you when a boiler really is a hot water cylinder and what brand and model it is, other than a white one in a cupboard. Or one of those new fangled combi boilers (condensing ones)

 

[PullerGas]

Poor Berny, I'm more than concerned about your metal health.