securespark Joined 11 Jan 2004 Messages 42,733 Reaction score 2,633 Country 11 Dec 2020 #2 Excellent! Thank you!
EFLImpudence Joined 7 Jul 2010 Messages 41,772 Reaction score 5,612 Location Retired to: Country 12 Dec 2020 #3 Can't remember where I heard it - The posh bloke who took his car to the garage and said a warning light was on - the 'gravy boat'.
Can't remember where I heard it - The posh bloke who took his car to the garage and said a warning light was on - the 'gravy boat'.
E ellal Joined 23 May 2004 Messages 15,499 Reaction score 737 Country 12 Dec 2020 #4 I'd have thought it's the dashboard telling you to prepare for what will finally happen to you on 01/01/2021
I'd have thought it's the dashboard telling you to prepare for what will finally happen to you on 01/01/2021
E ellal Joined 23 May 2004 Messages 15,499 Reaction score 737 Country 12 Dec 2020 #5 EFLImpudence said: Can't remember where I heard it - The posh bloke who took his car to the garage and said a warning light was on - the 'gravy boat'. Click to expand... "WordPerfect Technical Desk, may I help you?" "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect." "What sort of trouble?" "Well, I was typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away." "Went away?" "They disappeared." "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?" "Nothing." "Nothing." "It's blank; it won't accept anything that I type." "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?" "How do I tell?" "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?" "What's a sea-prompt?" "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?" "There isn't any cursor. I told you, it won't accept anything I type!" "Does your monitor have a power indicator?" "What's a monitor?" "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?" "I don't know." "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?" "Yes, I think so." "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall." "......Yes, it is." "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it not just one?" "No." "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable." "......Okay, here it is." Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of the computer." "I can't reach." "Uh-huh. Well, can you see if it is?" "No." "Even if you put your knee on something and lean way over?" "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle. It's because it's dark." "Dark?" "Yes, the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window." "Well, turn on the office light then." "I can't." "Why not?" "Because there's a power outage." "A power outage? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came it?" "Well, yes. I keep them in the closet." "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from." "Really? Is it that bad?" "Yes, I'm afraid it is." "Well, all right then. What do I tell them?" "Tell them you're too damn stupid to own a computer." The same still applies to the knuckle draggers on here!
EFLImpudence said: Can't remember where I heard it - The posh bloke who took his car to the garage and said a warning light was on - the 'gravy boat'. Click to expand... "WordPerfect Technical Desk, may I help you?" "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect." "What sort of trouble?" "Well, I was typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away." "Went away?" "They disappeared." "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?" "Nothing." "Nothing." "It's blank; it won't accept anything that I type." "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?" "How do I tell?" "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?" "What's a sea-prompt?" "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?" "There isn't any cursor. I told you, it won't accept anything I type!" "Does your monitor have a power indicator?" "What's a monitor?" "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?" "I don't know." "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?" "Yes, I think so." "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall." "......Yes, it is." "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it not just one?" "No." "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable." "......Okay, here it is." Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of the computer." "I can't reach." "Uh-huh. Well, can you see if it is?" "No." "Even if you put your knee on something and lean way over?" "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle. It's because it's dark." "Dark?" "Yes, the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window." "Well, turn on the office light then." "I can't." "Why not?" "Because there's a power outage." "A power outage? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came it?" "Well, yes. I keep them in the closet." "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from." "Really? Is it that bad?" "Yes, I'm afraid it is." "Well, all right then. What do I tell them?" "Tell them you're too damn stupid to own a computer." The same still applies to the knuckle draggers on here!