Moles

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There were these three moles - Daddy Mole, Mummy Mole and Baby Mole, all living in a mole hole. This mole hole was near a sugar factory. One morning they woke up, and could smell something unusual in the air. They sniffed for a bit, but couldn't quite make out what it was. They decided to go to the edge of the mole hole, for a better sniff. Daddy Mole and Mummy Mole led the way. The edge of the mole hole wasn't very big, so when the moles got to the edge of the mole hole, only Daddy Mole and Mummy Mole stuck their heads out of the mole hole, with Baby Mole stuck behind them. "Sniff sniff sniff," said Daddy Mole, "I can smell treacle". Baby Mole was trying to get past to smell what Daddy Mole could smell, but he couldn't. "Sniff sniff sniff," said Mummy Mole, "I can smell syrup". By this time Baby Mole was going mad, trying to get past Daddy Mole and Mummy Mole's bums to see what the smells were. But he couldn't squeeze past, and finally gave up. "Humph," he snuffled, "all I can smell is moleasses".
 
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Two men camping in the mountains had spent four days together, and they were getting a little testy. One morning, the first friend says, "You know, we're starting to get on each other's nerves. Why don't we split up today. I'll hike north and spend the day looking around, you hike south and spend the day. Then tonight, we'll have dinner and share our experiences over the campfire."
The second friend agrees and hikes south. The first man hikes north.
That night over dinner, the first man tells his story: "Today I hiked into a beautiful valley. I followed a stream up into a canyon and ate lunch. Then I swam in a crystal clear mountain lake. As I sat drying out, I watched deer come and drink from the stream. The wildflowers were filled with butterflies and hawks floated overhead throughout. How was your day?"
The second friend says, "I went south and ran across a set of railroad tracks. I followed them until I came across a beautiful young woman tied to the tracks. I cut the ropes off, gently lifted her off the tracks, and I made love with her all afternoon. Finally, when I was so tired I could barely move, I came back to camp."
"Wow!!" the first guy exclaimed, "Your day was MUCH better than mine. Head?"
"Nah," says the second friend over his meal, "I couldn't find it."
 
gord55 said:
I don't get it. Could you simplify it a bit?

Baby mole can't get past his Mum and Dad's bums. Ass is another word for bum. Molasses is a sugar product. 'Cus the baby mole can't get past, all he can smell is mole's asses. Sugar factory. Molasses.

Phew!
 
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