Moz?

[masona]

Moz, good to hear from you again, it's perfectly normal to feel like this at the early stages, time is a great heal as it won't happen overnight, just take one step at a time. Try and be strong and get help if needed. You've got us to talk to whenever you feel like it. Take care moz

I ended up getting a punch bag to take out my anger and it did calm me down

 

[Softus]

Moz, I agree with Thermo on this.

You need to give yourself a stiff talking to, because you're allowed to go off the rails a bit, the trouble is that you already have a legacy of going over to the dark side.

I expected you and Wendy to get together, and I'm surprised that you didn't see it coming. It doesn't have to be a bad thing; deal with your guilt and move on.

You need to make a sober choice Moz. And the first step is to get sober. You have as much support as you want/need on the forum, but there's only so much we can do with keyboards. Call Darren again and ask for his support.

 

[Moz]

I understand the right option now...

but the whiskey drink demon on my shoulder the whiskey is hitting home an its too comforting for more lifes knock backs ...


or
I can get too the airport in 30mins at most in a taxi,even mini cab .....check in ... race to Wens , fall to my knees ...beg my FORGIVENESS ....her to pick me up an hold me close an just feel good again ...an jet off with the ticket I just bought for her plane online..


then again the dunk moz thinks
hmm
sounds more like a film script ..
reall lifes not like that its its sh*t ...
what would my wife think ...christ ........shes not even cold in her cast ...

 

[Moz]

I have just emptied the whiskey bottle (demon) down the sink ....(broke me heart )hands shaking .....
need a clearer head to think ....an do the right thing ..

 

[Moz]

Softus
called him answerphone home an mobie ...

just tried to ring Wens Mums...an she doesnt want to talk to me ...Margaret told me shes hurting bad ....rejected twice ...



Going for a cold shower , F*ck It ......fair hearts never won maidens ....better to be that dead drunk here now an lost............. than wishing /whatever ......

booked a cab 2hr before flight just to be there ...

 

[Belrose]

MOZ - FOR GOD'S SAKE, MAN, WHAT DID MARIA SAY TO YOU ON HER DEATHBED ???????? Go to the airport, ask Wendy to understand that it was only the terrible grief and the drink talking....... You don't have to go with her tomorrow, just make things right between you and take it from there. Moz, don't waste your life; Maria is watching you,

Don't open another bottle Moz, just get ready to go to the airport. Maybe Wendy's mother will go with you...

Bel

 

[Thermo]

sounds like a film script, so what. youll never bloody know unless you try. If she kicks your arse away then at least you gave it a go. Now throw those sodding bottles away

 

[Softus]

Moz, don't make us all come up there and kick your a*se.

You're a big man and you'll do the right thing - just keep pouring the stuff away and sober up.

 

[Thermo]

pick you up on the way softus, just pulling on my old arse kicking boots now!

 

[markie]

moz follow your heart when your mind is free from the demon drink, don't let it cloud your thinking/actions. but don't rush in with two feet as the saying goes, take it step by step/ day by day and whatever happens will happen, but curb the drinking. Grief and drink don't mix, more you drink more you grieve, and more you grieve the more you drink, so the drink will have to suffer untill you can grieve without resorting to the drink.

I hope you can understand what im trying to say, ( im not the best with words )

Anyway I hope you can come through this ( I suspect you can ) might be hard, sorry will be hard but considering what you,ve said of your past I think/know you'll pull through.

PS but the drink won't help matters.

mark.

 

[Softus]

pick you up on the way softus

 

[Moz]

just out the shower
lying there cold freezing water ...

the whiskey (wallow in self pity /grief/kill -yourself)demon GONE.....

just hope later he doesnt land back saying I told you so ...sniggering ..

Anyway ...
rang again , Margaret...said just leave it ! ,
shes getting frisky an determined too just go .... an you know what a redhead is ...make their mind up ... ..(oh my ..)
maybe write an you can converse an see how it goes ...
I told Margaret ,
whatever happens my love... You were the lady I wanted for my Mother

she thanked me but wished it was mother in law ...shes a forcefully girl ,
try try ... try ... an more some to show your sincere now ....

she just said .....see
melt her heart ,
its like ICE after your refused her last time ......



Thanks an I know ...Margaret...cheers


gotta go too
the airport departure lounge .....
an wait there ,

if I can get ALL teddies an flowers ...

soberish /clean clothes /shaved ,
passport /money .........

MAIN THING /MAIN THING /

KEEP OUT THE BARS THERE ...

MAIN THING /MAIN THING /


I damn sure she will FORGIVE ME...

with respespect she will like my lass batter/slap me around the face .. Hard ..hurruh ...hopefully (my lass!) as I deserve....



I need to go from home /net access now

as I say goodbye to my family

...an will be back

but I will STILL sell the house to the Romanian orphanages charity .....as Maria wanted too ...



sell up
an make it work ,
shes the boss ....as my wife was !

life is easy there

but new builds all the time .....mean bathrooms an Tiling ... gcol (working holiday ) ...

going for good

look after your selfs ....

thankyou everyone for being good lads an sorting me out when I was in bits today ....you told me to try the dream .....


bestiest regards

Moz .........


















if not the films are rubbish an I played at it ....
I left a foot note on my death for

jonny fish MEN, editor to put in my obit ....
"dont try it" lol ..lol..lol

 

[securespark]

I have to say I agree with the general consensus of opinion here: I'm probably too late posting here, but you should bear in mind what Maria said, she would want you to be happy. I know it's difficult (I've been there too), but stay off the booze, mate, it doesn't make things easier really.

Follow your heart, find Wendy, and explain to her exactly how you are feeling and that of course it is very early days yet and you are understandably a maelstrom of emotions. You are perhaps not ready to think about this decision, however, put your cards on the table, be completely open with her, I'm sure she will respect you for that.

Like the guys say, you have sweet FA to lose and much to gain.

Do what you feel is the right thing. The best of luck to you.

 

[gcol]

If this really is your last post, be safe Moz. I'll miss your "lols".
Best...
Gareth

p.s. If you come back, the above is null and void.

 

[Zampa]

Moz...

Just read the news..

Deepest condolences,,,grieve with pride.