I went to a Tesco café yesterday and ordered a burger. They asked me if I wanted anything on it, and
I said: ‘Yes — a fiver each way.’
Does anyone have a tooth pick? I had a Tesco burger last night and there’s still a bit between my teeth.
I've got some Tesco burgers in the fridge. But . . . THEY’RE OFFFFFFFFF!
My doctor told me to watch what I eat, so I went out and bought tickets for the Grand National.
Tesco are giving treble points on your Clubcard for all burgers and petrol, starting today. The deal’s called Only Fuel and Horses.
What do you call a burnt Tesco burger? Black Beauty.
A motorist gets pulled over by a police officer, who asks him to blow into a breathalyser. The machine beeps.‘I’m sorry Sir,’ says the officer. ‘You’re over the limit. Can you tell me what you have had tonight?’
‘Nothing Officer,’ replies the man. ‘Just a burger from Tesco.’‘That explains it,’ says the policeman. ‘I knew I could smell Red Rum.’
They've found horse meat in Tesco burgers? It’s an unbridled disaster.
A Tesco burger walks into a bar. ‘A pint please.’‘I can’t hear you,’ says the barman.
‘Sorry’ replies the burger. ‘I’m a little bit horse.’
I selected some burgers on the Tesco website. And then clicked ‘Add to cart.’
Those Tesco horse burgers were nice, but I prefer My Lidl Pony.
A woman has been taken to hospital after eating Tesco burgers. Her condition is said to be stable.
I used to work on the Tesco meat counter, but it was like flogging a dead horse.
Last night I ate a Tesco burger, an Iceland burger and an Aldi burger to find out which tasted better....Tesco won by a short head.
I think someone may be sending me death threats. I woke up this morning with a Tesco burger in my bed.
I bought an ‘award-winning’ Tesco burger. I didn't realise they meant it had won the Cheltenham Gold Cup.
Personally, I think people who don’t like eating horse meat are being a bit blinkered.
Despite the recent news, Tesco says that their beef burger sales remain stable.
Are you in favour of horse meat in your burgers? Yay or Neigh?
I won’t be switching to Tesco Finest burgers. They’re so expensive that buying enough for a big family dinner won’t leave you much change from a pony.
Just been to Tesco and bought a bottle of Bacardi, a bottle of Lamb’s and some burgers. So that’s white rum, navy rum and Red Rum.
Despite the recent scandal, Tesco insist they use only meat of the highest quality. A spokesman said: ‘Our meat has to clear several hurdles before it goes on sale.’
What’s in this burger? It just jumped over my chips. I don’t know why there’s a fuss all of a sudden. There’s been horse meat in Tesco burgers for donkey’s years.
I like my burgers with a side saddle and neighonnaise.
Forget the Everyday Value burgers — I only eat those mini-burgers you have as snacks You know, the horse d’oeuvres.
I bought some Tesco burgers — I wanted to get venison ones, but they were dead dear.
Tesco would've got away with it if it wasn't for the DN Neigh test.
I said: ‘Yes — a fiver each way.’
Does anyone have a tooth pick? I had a Tesco burger last night and there’s still a bit between my teeth.
I've got some Tesco burgers in the fridge. But . . . THEY’RE OFFFFFFFFF!
My doctor told me to watch what I eat, so I went out and bought tickets for the Grand National.
Tesco are giving treble points on your Clubcard for all burgers and petrol, starting today. The deal’s called Only Fuel and Horses.
What do you call a burnt Tesco burger? Black Beauty.
A motorist gets pulled over by a police officer, who asks him to blow into a breathalyser. The machine beeps.‘I’m sorry Sir,’ says the officer. ‘You’re over the limit. Can you tell me what you have had tonight?’
‘Nothing Officer,’ replies the man. ‘Just a burger from Tesco.’‘That explains it,’ says the policeman. ‘I knew I could smell Red Rum.’
They've found horse meat in Tesco burgers? It’s an unbridled disaster.
A Tesco burger walks into a bar. ‘A pint please.’‘I can’t hear you,’ says the barman.
‘Sorry’ replies the burger. ‘I’m a little bit horse.’
I selected some burgers on the Tesco website. And then clicked ‘Add to cart.’
Those Tesco horse burgers were nice, but I prefer My Lidl Pony.
A woman has been taken to hospital after eating Tesco burgers. Her condition is said to be stable.
I used to work on the Tesco meat counter, but it was like flogging a dead horse.
Last night I ate a Tesco burger, an Iceland burger and an Aldi burger to find out which tasted better....Tesco won by a short head.
I think someone may be sending me death threats. I woke up this morning with a Tesco burger in my bed.
I bought an ‘award-winning’ Tesco burger. I didn't realise they meant it had won the Cheltenham Gold Cup.
Personally, I think people who don’t like eating horse meat are being a bit blinkered.
Despite the recent news, Tesco says that their beef burger sales remain stable.
Are you in favour of horse meat in your burgers? Yay or Neigh?
I won’t be switching to Tesco Finest burgers. They’re so expensive that buying enough for a big family dinner won’t leave you much change from a pony.
Just been to Tesco and bought a bottle of Bacardi, a bottle of Lamb’s and some burgers. So that’s white rum, navy rum and Red Rum.
Despite the recent scandal, Tesco insist they use only meat of the highest quality. A spokesman said: ‘Our meat has to clear several hurdles before it goes on sale.’
What’s in this burger? It just jumped over my chips. I don’t know why there’s a fuss all of a sudden. There’s been horse meat in Tesco burgers for donkey’s years.
I like my burgers with a side saddle and neighonnaise.
Forget the Everyday Value burgers — I only eat those mini-burgers you have as snacks You know, the horse d’oeuvres.
I bought some Tesco burgers — I wanted to get venison ones, but they were dead dear.
Tesco would've got away with it if it wasn't for the DN Neigh test.
