wedding speech

[kidgreen61]

Morning all, I'm in the middle of writing a speech for my daughter's wedding, and need a bit of help with a line that I thought of last night.

The line will read something like this;

"I thought I would use the internet for some ideas for this speech, so I Googled XXX, ..."

The punchline being, "... it took me at least 45 minutes to realise (that what Google came up with) wasn't quite what I had in mind"

The idea being that XXX is a word that is perfectly innocent in it's own right, but when Googled, takes on an entirely different meaning.

So, do you have any suggestions for a word that a novice speechwriter might Google, that are associated with speeches/weddings/daughters, and, are great double entendres?

Think watersports etc.

Many thanks in anticipation.

I'll let you know if I choose one, and how it goes

 

[HERTS P&D]

Many years ago I needed some washers, so I typed into google: 'Rubber washers' and many adult sites came up. Anything to do with rubber/wet suits might be an idea if your daughter likes water sports, diving, water ski-ing etc.

Andy

 

[kidgreen61]

That's the sort of thing, thanks.

 

[Shutpa]

What about the man in the yacht race who fell overboard in between the yachts owned by David Cameron and Ed Balls? Luckily he was pulled to safety by the Camerons.

 

[Bahco]

How about "this wedding was the most emotional one I have ever attended. Even the wedding cake was in tears! (tiers)

 

[RedHerring2]

A little part of a wedding speech that I heard once, after a little talk about the bride's/groom's history and earlier "social life", was something along the lines of "now that the bride/groom is settling down to married life, their secret lover can not drop by anymore. So, you may as well hand your key (to the bride's/groom's house/flat) back, just bring them here and leave them on the table."

Prior to the wedding you've handed out keys to numerous guests, for them to play their part, when asked.

Obviously, some "hilarious" set-ups should be included.

Unfortunately, not much to with water sports unless it's wound-up within the water sports social circles.

 

[joinerjohn]

If you google "Adult Watersports", google throws up thousands of Adult sites ,,, all related to "watersports" (but not the sort that include water skiing, jet ski's or sailing etc) Although there are a few loosely related to some sort of diving.

 

[Mw Roofline]

Kid green have a look on youtube for speeches, plenty of stuff to pinch.

 

[EFCLee1]

As long as you insult everyone in the room and its actually funny your onto a winner!!

Put things like "chinstrap" and "mailorder bride" into it should be a good laugh