If I’m reading between the lines correctly it’s seems you are upset by the sudden loss of a home rather than the relationship…..so maybe long term it might for the best, even if it does leave you up sh1t creek at the moment.
If it’s been terminal since 2020, it can’t be good for you mental health
Seems pretty nasty after 26 years, I wonder what’s led her to that. I’ve no idea what age you are, it couldn’t be menopause, could it?
I seem to recall your partner got a decorator in to do the hallway when she couldn’t wait for you and it was so bad you had to redo it…..apols if It was somebody else.
To be honest, the way I feel at the moment, I am more upset by the impending loss of the garage. A family friend has offered to allow me to store some of my tools in their (not quite as secure garage). Unfortunately it is smaller and has no electricity, so I am going to have to sell some of my larger tools.
She went through the menopause several years ago. She kicked me out for 2-3 months and asked me to come back once she suspected that I was seeing someone. I was happy to go back for her, my stepson, the dogs, and the garage. That time she changed the locks. I asked her why and she admitted it was out of spite. At no point had I attempted to gain entry. I had all the tools I needed on site. She didn't however box up my non-clothes related stuff in our bedroom.
Of late, increasing we had become ships that pass in the night. I would often time my exit from the pub in the hope that she would be asleep. Attempts at small talk resulted in one word answers. She recently went on holiday and only told me the day she was leaving.
She sent me a text on a Friday- telling me that I don't need to pay my "rent" for December and that "we need to talk". I didn't notice the message until the following week. I saw her the following Sunday and apologised for being late paying my share of the bills, but that she would have the money by the end of the week. She replied "OK". I replied to her text on the following Wednesday. I mentioned that it sounded ominous and asked her if she was planning to sell up. She told me that I was out of the house. I asked for two weeks to sort out logistics. She said no. I asked for a week. She said no. I asked if I could have one night so that I could pick up clothes, my toothbrush, etc. she said no.
People I know have told me that I should have just turned up anyway. I am not particularly good at confrontation and didn't want to burn bridges.
I had to wake up the next day, put toothpaste on my finger to brush my teeth, wear the same clothes and buy toiletries and some clothes after work.
You are correct that she asked me to redec the hallway the day after the other guy had finished.
Recently, she hired some really awful decorators to paint the front and rear elevations. You can see where their roller hit the timber door frame and rather than wiping away the excess masonry paint, they just glossed over it. Under normal circumstances, she would not tolerate such shoddy work, if nothing else, I have taught her how to spot a quality finish.
I suspect that she plans to sell the property. Ages ago, she said that if the neighbour's house sold for a certain price, she would sell up. The neighbour's house has recently been sold.
Sorry for hi-jacking this thread. I was (am) feeling sorry for myself.
Thanks for all of the replies though.