Men working in childcare

[MarkBarl]

A survey revealed that of every 100 people working in early years childcare only 2 are men.

Single mothers appear to be particularly concerned, with 66% saying they would like a man to be involved in their child's development.

However, of the parents questioned, 59% said there was not a single man employed at the nursery to which they sent their child.

One of the main problems as I see it though, is the media and their scaremongering reporting. If any man shows an interest in working with children, it is almost automatically assumed that he must be some kind of Paedophile. It's the same reason that scout leaders and other similar organisations are having men leave in their droves.

Personally I also feel that it would be really difficult for men to work with young children with the current climate. I know with my two girls, when they play with me, they often want to climb all over me or get me to throw them in the air or spin them round. It is different from the playing they do with their mum, it has a much more physical aspect. Yes there are also times when they want to sit on my lap and read a book, or have a cuddle and watch CBeebies.

It is sad that fear has put us in a situation where rules a regulations prohibit natural play. What can you do though? From child protection training that I have received (I help out in a youth club sometimes) I know that those who want to abuse children are devious and will try to get themselves into a position of trust. (Just look at how many priests and school teachers are splashed in the media)

BBC News Story

 

[tim west]

Unfortunately this is what happens when people jump to the gun and assume before rational thinking has a chance to take over, once someone has made their mind up about someone else no manner of evidence otherwise will budge their beliefs and they will try to find other reasons why they shouldnt budge on that belief.

I personally believe this is a by product of the black and white reporting in the media since around the 80's which started with papers like the Sun etc, which proceeded to force their opinions and editorial content upon their readers so much so that a mental change of thought has taken place where rational or logical thinking has given way to the immediate acceptance of what the person has just read without predjudice of the content or it's validity.

This has continued to this day with tv programmes like the Matthew Wright Show where if the caller shows any form of disagreement with his (Matthews)viewpoint then a sarcastic remark is made and the caller is disconnected without any chance of rebuke.

Intensive reporting of Paedophile cases have made public opinion sway on the very defensive side

This has wrongly made many men feel guilty for no reason and has had almost a reprogramming effect on the male attitude so much so that some men now question how they would approach a child, for example helping a child in distress such as a lost child, holding their hand whilst trying to find their mummy.

About time that attitudes changed and the minority of bad apples don't contaminate the rest of the harvest.

Endnote
There is also an element of confidence here in that a male person should be able to turn around to others and say hey i've done no wrong and i dont care what others may think, thats their problem, get over it!

 

[ricicle]

Excellent post Tim

 

[Alastairreid]

This has wrongly made many men feel guilty for no reason and has had almost a reprogramming effect on the male attitude so much so that some men now question how they would approach a child, for example helping a child in distress such as a lost child, holding their hand whilst trying to find their mummy.

which is a very sad indictment on our society!.

 

[AndrewSchofield]

This has wrongly made many men feel guilty for no reason and has had almost a reprogramming effect on the male attitude so much so that some men now question how they would approach a child, for example helping a child in distress such as a lost child, holding their hand whilst trying to find their mummy.

which is a very sad indictment on our society!.

Indeed!!! I have to say I had never really thought about it but now its been mentioned you can imagine how easy it would be for a man to be accused of trying to kidnap a child when in fact he was innocently trying to help him/her be reunited with their parents!!

 

[securespark]

This has wrongly made many men feel guilty for no reason and has had almost a reprogramming effect on the male attitude so much so that some men now question how they would approach a child, for example helping a child in distress such as a lost child, holding their hand whilst trying to find their mummy.

I very much agree with that. I worry about that scenario too. But if I were ever in that position, I would probably do what came naturally.

 

[unseen]

Unfortunetly it is all of whats been said thats stopping men getting into childcare... (My appologies for it being long but this is one subject thats close to me personally.. )

My brother (22) is my regular baby sitter/child minder/helper for my 3 girls (3/7/8 ) he's been helping us since his 1st neice was born as we both had to return to work.
Now he did ok at school, but never seemed to know what to do afterwards, after the usual teen umming and arring he enrolled on a Childcare NVQ course.. Breezed through the level 1 getting distinctions in all modules. Level 2 required a lot of work experience as well as course work... Well as you can imagine coursework excellent still disctinctions again and as for the work experience well... 2 nurserys and 1 primary school couldn't say a bad word about him, with the nurserys both saying if they had a place they would have had him on the books as he really got on with the kids and surprisingly was well received by the parents which 1 of the nurserys admitted they thought there would be some apprehension.. Anyway walks away with all these merits and distinctions and really into it, Level 3 NVQ requires you to HAVE a job to actually do it.....
Yep you guessed it could he get a job?? NO... With all these glowing references etc the 2 places he tried couldn't see past the fact he was male.. He could never prove this, but when he then learnt that 1 of the girls on his course who struggled to get a level 1 pass got one of the jobs he applied for well it beggered belief and he took it quite badly. Now after putting all that time in he's now struggling to find even a McJob and when I spoke to other family recently he was going to throw 2 yrs worth of training (goverment funded at that) away and just try computers or "something"... I agree that a lot of the blame is the media, but I think honestly the remainder of the blame sits squarely with peoples old fashioned attitudes (funny.. this saturdays casualty had a similar theme with a woman making a snarky comment about a male nurse). My major gripe about all this is the likes of the job centre.. He was saying there were 2 nursery posts listed and he asked to apply. To which the advisor said "Oh I'm not sure... They need qualifications" so he speils off his sales pitch and the advisor droid looking worried then says "Well we can put you in touch but I wouldn't expect them to call back" bloody flaming ridiculous!...
(Sorry for getting on the soap box..)

Rob

 

[Shutpa]

As a retired teacher and an ex childminderof boys and girls I have got to be honest and say that I have never felt guilty looking after children. In fact, if I hadn't developed a heart problem I would probably have still been child-minding today - I have been asked on several occasions.

Back in the early eighties, I remember that all the staff were given a talk on the 'new dangers' in teaching and after that I became very careful about pupil contact. This lasted for about two years until one day I came face to face with one of the senior girls in the foyer. I could see that she was not her usual self but before I could say something to cheer her up, she burst into tears and said "Oh Mr Bolo, I need a cuddle" and she got one. We stood there for two or three minutes and I felt her tears seeping through my shirt. Half way through this, the headmaster appeared and stood in absolute silence until the girl pulled herself together. When she did, she told us that her nan had died the evening before.Following that incident I decided to act as I saw fit at all times and to hell with what other people thought.

 

[Alastairreid]

i applaud you for that mr bolo!.

 

[tim west]

In that situation the girl was old enough to explain why she was being hugged but what if the child is too young to explain that you had no ill intentions?

You could end up being on the wrong end of an accusingly pointed finger

 

[Shutpa]

You could have ended up being on the wrong end of an accusingly pointed finger

I've changed your post Tim because as I have long given up child-minding, it's water under the bridge now. That said, I can say that I can and did give all nine of the children I looked after hugs on many occasions and the parents expected it of me. What else do you do when a three or four year old is upset when his or her parents leave the child with me for the first time? What else would you do when the child falls off, or gets hit by a swing in the park? What else would you do when another child at the playgroup punches your charge in the face? Well I dont know what you would do Tim, but I would give them a hug. And if 30 mothers at the playgroup, for example, were looking on, so what? I was being paid to look after these kids and look after them I did.

I never gave a single thought to what others might think and still dont.

 

[tim west]

I was talking in the future tense and not in an already established situation where parents are aware and know you, A complete stranger may read the situation otherwise.

 

[Shutpa]

Tim, if I may quote myself, "I never gave a single thought to what others might think and still dont".

 

[tim west]

Tim, if I may quote myself, "I never gave a single thought to what others might think and still dont".

I heard you bolo I was just asking what would happen in a different scenario one where a man could quite easily find his intentions misinterpreted

 

[MarkBarl]

Unfortunetly it is all of whats been said thats stopping men getting into childcare... (My appologies for it being long but this is one subject thats close to me personally.. )

He has very good grounds to take them to court on the basis of sex discrimination.