Truth ?

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As I sat, strapped in my seat waiting during the countdown, one
thought kept crossing my mind ... every part of this rocket was
supplied by the lowest bidder.
-John Glenn

When the white missionaries came to Africa they had the Bible and we
had the land. They said 'Let us pray.' We closed our eyes.
When we opened them we had the Bible and they had the land.
- Desmond Tutu

America is the only country where a significant proportion of the
population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon
landing was faked.
- David Letterman

I'm not a paranoid, deranged millionaire. I'm a billionaire.
- Howard Hughes

After the game, the King and the Pawn go into the same box.
- Italian proverb

The only reason they say 'Women and children first'
is to test the strength of the lifeboats.
- Jean Kerr

I've been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take
out the garbage.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a
new wife.
- Prince Philip

Wood burns faster when you have to cut and chop it yourself.
- Harrison Ford

The best cure for sea sickness, is to sit under a tree.
- Spike Milligan

Lawyers believe a man is innocent until proven broke.
- Robin Hall

Kill one man and you're a murderer, kill a million
and you're a conqueror.
- Jean Rostand.

Having more money doesn't make you happier.
I have 50 million dollars but I'm just as happy as when I had 48
million.
- Arnold Schwarzenegger.

We are here on earth to do good unto others. What the others are here
for, I have no idea.
- W. H. Auden

If life were fair, Elvis would still be alive today and all the
impersonators would be dead.
- Johnny Carson

Hollywood must be the only place on earth where you can be fired by a
man wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a baseball cap.
- Steve Martin

Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is.
- Jimmy Durante

America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric.
- Doug Hamwell

If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to
the airport.
- Jonathan Winter

I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it.
- Robert Benchley

The weather person is the only person that I know, that can be wrong
99.9 % of the time and still have a job the next day.
-Johnny Carson

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When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a
new wife.
- Prince Philip
Zorba also said...

“In the event that I am reincarnated, I would like to return as a deadly virus, to contribute something to solving overpopulation.”

Maybe it wasn't the Chinese after all?

Perhaps he got in early?
 
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