"DON'T TEASE LITTLE OLD LADIES"

[jonnyfishing]

Defence Attorney:
Will you please state your age?

Little Old Lady:
I am 86 years old.

Defence Attorney:
Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st?

Little Old Lady:
There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening,
when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.

Defence Attorney:
Did you know him?

Little Old Lady:
No, but he sure was friendly.

Defence Attorney:
What happened after he sat down?

Little Old Lady:
He started to rub my thigh.

Defence Attorney:
Did you stop him?

Little Old Lady:
No, I didn't stop him.

Defence Attorney:
Why not?

Little Old Lady:
It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 30 years ago.

Defence Attorney:
What happened next?

Little Old Lady:
He began to rub my breasts.

Defence Attorney:
Did you stop him then?

Little Old Lady:
No, I did not stop him.

Defence Attorney:
Why not?

Little Old Lady:
His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years!

Defence Attorney:
What happened next?

Little Old Lady:
Well, by then, I was feeling so "spicy" that I just laid down and told him
"Take me, young man. Take me now!"

Defence Attorney:
Did he take you?

Little Old Lady:
Hell, no! He just yelled, "April Fool!" And that's when I shot him, the little b-stard.

 

[markie]

Is that a true story or not.

 

[esra_ptrap]

MOD: How is it that this is okay but my post on the Hayley Westenra topic has repeatedly been deleted? At least apply some consistency.

 

[Steve]

esra_ptrap, that sounds incredibly vulgar if you interpret a certain way, i cant even see another way to interpret it, to be honest.

 

[jonnyfishing]

Is that a true story or not.

It must be true Markie, I read it in the Sun

 

[markie]

esra_ptrap, that sounds incredibly vulgar if you interpret a certain way, i cant even see another way to interpret it, to be honest.

Thats because your young, but if your ready to meet your maker it might sound exciting

 

[markie]

Is that a true story or not.

It must be true Markie, I read it in the Sun

Or mlbc3 told you then it would be true, being over the pond.

 

[kevplumb]

err markie yer don't argue with a smith and wesson .38

 

[RF Lighting]

Shouldn't you have changed your location by now Kev?

 

[kevplumb]

working on it marra

we have a problem with the air con

and the fact that bett don't want a diesel tranny parked out back

bugger might have to buy a dodge sprinter (same as the merc)

 

[RF Lighting]

working on it marra

Doesn't take long.

Look, I'm all American.

 

[kevplumb]

the ell yer are

ohh wait till she gets in from work boy

she'll richously kick your ass

 

[markie]

OMG she's even let him loose in her house by himself it must be love.

PS how did they let you in the country

 

[kevplumb]

ow the ell did she get to artlepool without me knowing

 

[markie]

ow the ell did she get to artlepool without me knowing

The mind boggles can't wait to see the wed photo's

PS good luck marra ( she'll need it )