Inappropriate Language

[securespark]

I'm not talking about F words here.

I have talked about this before and been shouted down with cries of "Get over it!", but I do feel very strongly about it.

When I was born, I was 3 months premature, had severe oxygen starvation and nearly died. I was midway down the birth canal when contractions stopped and the doctors declared me a lost cause. They told my mother they would "get me out" in the morning by which time I was expected to be dead. The priest came and gave me the last rites. In the morning I was still alive, but a horrible black colour so I was birthed and then placed in an oxygen tent for 6 weeks, suffered pneumonia and bronchitis and finally was diagnosed with cerebral palsy - a right-sided hemi-plegia caused by damage to the left hand side of the brain. The right hand side of my body is under-developed, I am moderately deaf, I have Myasthenia Gravis, hormonal deficiencies and the latest thing I am suffering is ocular migraine.

CP has affected me all my life and continues to do so: some in the medical profession have told me they believe that CP sufferers can suffer other conditions later in life, which is what has happened to me.

However, I battle on, even when times are hard.

One thing is certain, though. I don't want you feeling sorry for me.

I just ask one thing: to think about the impact of using words like "******".

 

[sooey]

I take it you are referring to my use of it in the maddie thread. The word exists, it's there to be used, and was not addressed to you.
Get over yourself man.

 

[Micilin]

I take it you are referring to my use of it in the maddie thread. The word exists, it's there to be used, and was not addressed to you.
Get over yourself man.

'The word exists, it's there to be used' ?

This is to be taken seriously?

 

[securespark]

Have to agree Micilin. When I was young, I was called all sorts, including "******" and "spaz". And it hurt, oh boy did it hurt.

I can see from the quote that he says it was not addressed to me: maybe not, but that does not mean it's OK to use the word.

If I was black, would it be excusable to use the "N" word because it was not addressed to me?

 

[joe-90]

You aint gonna change the world, kid.

 

[masona]

When I was young, I was called all sorts, including "******" and "spaz". And it hurt, oh boy did it hurt.

Some human being are inhuman

Generally speaking, these people are unhappy, insecure, and have low self-esteem.

Joe is spot on, we can't change the world we live in

 

[wotan]

Some people can be very cruel, it's in thier nature, but remember it's only words.

Wotan

 

[enyam]

Yoy carry yourself with dignity on here secure, rise above it,easy to say I know.

 

[Susiejb]

it's difficult to understand SP why people at times feel the need to be so deliberately nasty and unkind.
Hopefully by highlighting this isssue you will make people just stop and think a little more before they speak.

 

[sooey]

I take it you are referring to my use of it in the maddie thread. The word exists, it's there to be used, and was not addressed to you.
Get over yourself man.

'The word exists, it's there to be used' ?

This is to be taken seriously?

Yes !! You could hardly describe securespark as a ******, the fact that he's complaining about somebody else's use of the word in a thread which had nothing to do with him, simply because he was called that name as a child is ridiculous.
What word shall we ban next? Simply because it may have negative connotations for somebody somewhere.
If people with such delicate sensibilities as securespark get their way we'll all have to proof read whatever we write before submitting it.
Get over yourself securespark you silly wuss.

 

[conny]

World English Dictionary
******

— vb
1. ( tr ) to delay or slow down (the progress, speed, or development) of (something)

— n
2. offensive ( US ) a retarded person
3. offensive ( US ) a foolish person

[C15: from Old French retarder , from Latin ******āre , from re- + tardāre to make slow, from tardus sluggish; see tardy ]

Collins English Dictionary - Complete & Unabridged 10th Edition
2009 © William Collins Sons & Co. Ltd. 1979, 1986 © HarperCollins

So do people who use this kind of language think themselves so perfect?
Do they not have any imperfections?
When I was young I had a 'lazy eye' and would often be called Clarence after the crossed eyed lion in Daktari. It hurt like hell and through out my life, even though my eye has improved, I have been embarrassed to look people in the face. I force myself to do it as a mark of respect when speaking to them. But I will never forget the hurt it caused me.
SS, thank you for bringing this subject up. You have shown tremendous strength throughout your life in dealing with this. Hopefully by highlighting it on here it will make people proof read their posts and maybe, just maybe, make them ask them selves if they would like to be called that name they have written.

 

[securespark]

All: thanks for the support, guys.

joe: I realise I'm not going to change the way of the world. Just hoping maybe as susie says, people may pause for thought and choose their words carefully.

mason, enyam, wotan- love your sigs, man! And thanks, you're dead right!

 

[Susiejb]

I think that in this case its obvious that sooey did not direct the word at SP....the maddie thread got out of hand long before it was locked. The problem with a forum is that we are basically faceless individuals, and it is easy to forget that we all actually have feelings....and can be hurt by things that are said. i think SP's post is a reminder to everyone that none of us are made of stone and its good that he has reminded us of that.


ooooops sorry SP our posts crossed....

 

[joe-90]

I honestly couldn't care less what anyone says to me or about me. It's a game, not real life.

 

[Norcon]

A bit like the matrix.