Banks Drive Through ATMs.

20 Jul 2007
Reaction score
United Kingdom
A new sign in the Bank reads:
"Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.
Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts".

After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."

1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set hand brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on mobile phone you will call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate purse and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in cheque book and place receipt in back of cheque book.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release handbrake.
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amusing but not always true.

i seem to wait behind a large amount of men seemingly trying to access their mortgage details at the ATM :rolleyes:
amusing but not always true.

i seem to wait behind a large amount of men seemingly trying to access their mortgage details at the ATM :rolleyes:
It's not meant to be bloody true, it's a joke FFS! :rolleyes:
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It's not meant to be b****y true, it's a joke FFS!

are you trying to say that everything we read might not be absolutely solid irrefutable fact. :eek:

goodness this the internet, surely it has to be true :confused:
We've had them in Leeds for ages

Another JCB job, they did Lloyds bank around the corner a few years back and got away with the ATM, left a ruddy big hole in the wall!
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