Village of Dementia?

[diy_fun_uk]

I'm going to type something, and please understand I do not mean this with any disrespect whatsoever as I appreciate these situations can be emotionally draining.

I live alone, no partner or kids. Assuming it remains this way for the rest of my life (which is possible if not probable) I would like to think, if I'm ever advised I have the onset of dementia, that I will have the courage to end my own life. I look at it quite pragmatically. In scenarios where people have a (family or close friend) support network around them, it's perhaps different. As the affected individual, you might take the view 'I want to be here as long as possible to see the grandkids grow up' or whatever. As the affected family, you will likely take the view 'we'll care for you directly and/or through supported care', assuming you have even a semblance of feelings for the parent.

I won't have that. So if I'm ever in a situation where I'm told I have such a condition, I'll be out of here pronto. With no family and/or close friend network, I don't like the thought of being in the care of others with no one else to care for me that has a true connection. And no, before anyone misconstrues or twists my words as often seems to be the case on here, I'm not saying the care sector doesn't care and doesn't provide great care in many cases.

 

[ericmark]

My mother would decide to go home, and try wheeling from her home since 1954 to her home when she was a girl, we were told since not sectioned we were not allowed to lock the door, we had an alarm on the door so we knew when she went on wheel about (she was in a wheel chair) so we could go and persuade her to return, but when she went into a home to give us a break, they locked the doors, how does that work out?

Getting an alarm to work was a problem, when anyone knocks on the door, since alarm upstairs to wake us at night, needed us to go upstairs to turn it off first, we tried all sorts and ended up with smart socket so both timed and could use a remote control.

What seemed odd was I had to work out a system, there must be loads of children looking after their parents one would have thought the extruder alarms would be designed to allow carers in at appointed times, and the children could set and switch off alarms from either door or bedroom.

Social services fitted the alarm, but had no idea how to make it work.

 

[gant]

***********

 

[diy_fun_uk]

Why have I received a message re this thread saying a post of mine was deleted 'because the thread isn't about covid'? I wasn't aware I had posted anything to do with covid in this thread?

Your post was deleted with some off-topic posts, but reinstated a moment later. You were sent a message to explain & apologize.

 

[jj4091]

one would have thought the extruder alarms would be designed to allow carers in at appointed times,

In our area carers rarely arrive at the appointed times

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

In our area carers rarely arrive at the appointed times

The simple solution is an electronic code lock - enter the correct code and the alarm is switched off for several seconds.

 

[jj4091]

I'm going to type something, and please understand I do not mean this with any disrespect whatsoever as I appreciate these situations can be emotionally draining.

I live alone, no partner or kids. Assuming it remains this way for the rest of my life (which is possible if not probable) I would like to think, if I'm ever advised I have the onset of dementia, that I will have the courage to end my own life. I look at it quite pragmatically. In scenarios where people have a (family or close friend) support network around them, it's perhaps different. As the affected individual, you might take the view 'I want to be here as long as possible to see the grandkids grow up' or whatever. As the affected family, you will likely take the view 'we'll care for you directly and/or through supported care', assuming you have even a semblance of feelings for the parent.

I won't have that. So if I'm ever in a situation where I'm told I have such a condition, I'll be out of here pronto. With no family and/or close friend network, I don't like the thought of being in the care of others with no one else to care for me that has a true connection. And no, before anyone misconstrues or twists my words as often seems to be the case on here, I'm not saying the care sector doesn't care and doesn't provide great care in many cases.

Many years ago my GP was trying to persuade me to give up smoking. I told him I did not want to live to be an old man in need of care & if I got to my 3 score years & 10 I would be quite happy. His reply was "come back & tell me that when you are 69" and when I had a heart attack & triple bypass just before my 69th birthday I FOUGHT LIKE HELL TO LIVE.
My point is you really have no idea how you will react, until you come face to face with mortality no matter how firm your beliefs are before you get there.

 

[Deleted member 174758]

Who has got dementia you or your partner ?
I'm not sure about dementia but you seem demented getting out of bed for a dog walk at 2.30 am

I can tell that neither you, nor your dog, has prostate issues...

 

[gas112]

When people say me included that i would end it instead of getting into that state at what point is that state from being reasonably compos mentis one day to not having a scooby the next . And having seen first hand someone dying in pain being told if they removed feeding tubes they would be dead in days instead of weeks with no belief in afterlife etc they refused, human nature to stay alive as long as we can regardless

 

[Odds]

When people say me included that i would end it instead of getting into that state at what point is that state from being reasonably compos mentis one day to not having a scooby the next . And having seen first hand someone dying in pain being told if they removed feeding tubes they would be dead in days instead of weeks with no belief in afterlife etc they refused, human nature to stay alive as long as we can regardless

Maybe so...but when i see another thread on B****t or migrants it does test my will to live

 

[ajstoneservices]

I found out at the Weekend that someone who worked for me when I lived in London has dementia. He is only 54 and apparently it is quite bad.

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

I found out at the Weekend that someone who worked for me when I lived in London has dementia. He is only 54 and apparently it is quite bad.

It happened to a one time very lively friend of mine at 57, a domestic and commercially qualified gas fitter - he passed away the following year. It was all surprisingly rapid.

 

[diy_fun_uk]

Many years ago my GP was trying to persuade me to give up smoking. I told him I did not want to live to be an old man in need of care & if I got to my 3 score years & 10 I would be quite happy. His reply was "come back & tell me that when you are 69" and when I had a heart attack & triple bypass just before my 69th birthday I FOUGHT LIKE HELL TO LIVE.
My point is you really have no idea how you will react, until you come face to face with mortality no matter how firm your beliefs are before you get there.

Yeah I get all that, how we feel today might not be how we feel tomorrow etc. However, quite specifically when it comes to illnesses that rob you of your faculties, I seriously doubt I'd want to hang around, especially as I say with no family/friend support network.

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

Yeah I get all that, how we feel today might not be how we feel tomorrow etc. However, quite specifically when it comes to illnesses that rob you of your faculties, I seriously doubt I'd want to hang around, especially as I say with no family/friend support network.

On the other hand, the smoking might well be the cause of making you very ill, and perhaps living a long and miserable old age as a result of the smoking, not to mention the cost. As we get older, we all do have to cope with poorer health and not being as fit as we once were, but why risk making it worse than it need be?

 

[jj4091]

On the other hand, the smoking might well be the cause of making you very ill, and perhaps living a long and miserable old age as a result of the smoking, not to mention the cost. As we get older, we all do have to cope with poorer health and not being as fit as we once were, but why risk making it worse than it need be?

So can alcohol & drugs, cars, electric shock, crossing the road, covid etc. etc. but we have to live with the risks.
I have not smoked for years though now but nobody can tell me the damage has not already been done or even if my heart attack was caused by it. Just that stopping reduces the risk not eliminates it.