Grief...

[Blasphemous]

In order to continue the discussion started over on the other thread: //www.diynot.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=258716&sid=800e828e45cd7094060557d5aa46d9a6

What is grief? Is it your heart breaking at the loss of someone you love, someone you respect, someone you admire? Is it nothing more than a chemical release that simply needs addressing with a drug to rebalance your emotions?

Most of us have, do and will grieve for our loved ones but some of us also show a form of grief for people we don't 'really' know. Why is that?

 

[Mw Roofline]

I think if you have bonded with someone in any way either though a film or someone you know then you have grief. You've at one time made a connection with the person which gave you joy/happiness and now that person has gone.

 

[libby lou lou]

Without reading the link, you can grieve over too many things, i think i am a case, that bad, i call it depression.

 

[conny]

Grief is something different to everyone, just as love is.
Can you explain what love is? Maybe you can explain what it means/feels like for you but somebody else will describe it differently. It is an individual feeling.
As for 'grieving for someone we don't know', we feel as though we have come to know them, even if it is only the public portrayal of that person. They have brought something into our lives, be it music, theatre, sport or something else and because of that input into our lives we feel sadness that they will no longer be able to do that except through our memories of them.
Like Big Tone on the other thread I too wept when Karen Carpenter died because I fell in love with her as a teenager and never fell out of it, and I'm not ashamed to admit it. I still listen to her music to this day and it can bring back so many memories for me. The same is true when Freddie Mercury died. He has had such an influence on my taste of music, as did The Carpenters who where totally different musicians, that to know they will only be a part of my life through their past successes brings a feeling of sadness yet at the same time joy for having been able to 'associate' with them.

 

[ursamajor]

Grief is, for me anyway, the definite and irrefutable end of an era. A person dies - while they lived their memories and experiences still lived with them and when they cease to be, we have to rely on our own memories and the fear that these memories will fade.

It's a cliche, but the light is snuffed.

As for my reference to Donne - "Never send to know for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee" marks the end of a famous and highly relevant passage

 

[Blasphemous]

Grief is, for me anyway, the definite and irrefutable end of an era. A person dies - while they lived their memories and experiences still lived with them with them and when they cease to be, we have to rely on our own memories and the fear that these memories will fade.

It's a cliche, but the light is snuffed.

As for my reference to Donne - "Never send to know for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee" marks the end of a famous and highly relevant passage

I liked that.

 

[spacecat]

I cried when michael jackson died





Some of those joke texts were side splitters

 

[ursamajor]

I cried when michael jackson died





Some of those joke texts were side splitters

Good grief

 

[PrenticeBoyofDerry]

What is grief?

grief is what my missus gives me when I walk in the room with my boots on, or just when I walk in the room

 

[Nige F]

Without reading the link, you can grieve over too many things, i think i am a case, that bad, i call it depression.

Indeed it appears symptomatic of clinical depression . You have my genuine sympathy. It should be included in the "embarassing illnesses" TV series - I`d rather see someone responding to modern therapies for that than various Groins and crutches exposed to all

 

[Big Tone]

It isn’t, as I think was inferred on the other thread, just about whether you have met them or not but what that person means to you. You don’t have to meet someone for them to be special in your life, stating the obvious I hope, and when they are gone it is a perfectly natural reaction to feel sad. How people react, however, is another question and I agree with Joe about Princess Diana.

I thought the outpouring over her was so ridiculous it got to a point where it really started to make me cringe. I was living in America at the time and I can tell you the reaction over there was truly unbelievable! But that ‘mass hysteria’ was something very different and exceptional and I don’t think it’s the same as people simply paying their respects to someone in a ‘normal’ way, which is what sparked this thread. It is part of a coping mechanism we all use; well most of us. No-one is going OTT or committing suicide, like they did when Elvis died, but a few words expressing the loss of someone on a forum is hardly in the same league.

I was close to tears just the other day when I saw a poor man in a documentary on the war in Iraq. A bunker which America and the allied forces thought was a hide for insurgents was in fact just civilians. Men, woman and children were obliterated!

This one man who had survived was crying and shaking with fear and anger, his heart broken at the loss of his sister, wife and children. His whole life had been taken away before his very eyes and it was so hard for me to watch and not feel for that poor innocent man at his loss and life sentence. I hadn’t met him and I don’t know his name, but it is this feeling of empathy and compassion towards others which separates us from other animals. We don’t even have to understand why these ‘strangers’ and terrible things upset us but it’s who we are and I don’t see anything wrong with it.

 

[ajstoneservices]

Sad then that you advocate speeding which leads to many of us grieving at the loss of a loved one.

 

[ursamajor]

Sad then that you advocate speeding which leads to many of us grieving at the loss of a loved one.

Hearses don't speed

 

[ajstoneservices]

They would if BT was driving and he thought it safe to do so.

 

[Mickymoody]

My girlfriend lost her Father on the 29th January, a few years back..the day after my Birthday..

Then lost her Mother on the same day, a year later...

She then lost 3 brothers,

So she is upset. She is angry. Then my Mother posted, 'You never talked to your parent's, you are a hippocrite', at which point my girlfrind took an overdose, and I cut all communication to my parents, how harsh is that?

Trying to talk to anyone, is impossible, so I fully expect a suicide, on the 29th January, by either me or her, as she is very aggressive, posting angrily, need to keep a watch on.