Relationship has hit the buffers

[Dork Lard]

What's the going rate for a brass?

I've paid £1000 & not been left with the feeling I got robbed.

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

What would happen if things didn't work out with her living with you? she'd be homeless, no money, and having to rent somewhere paying at least what her mortgage cost, maybe she's thinking of this aswell, it's not an easy decision for her to make.

Even that, would be a better financial outcome, than having her home forcibly repossessed. She would end up with more in the bank from a voluntary sale, than if it were repossessed and actioned.

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

I suppose part of the challenge is the older we get, the more baggage we tend to have. Not always of course, however not uncommon.

True, but her only 'baggage' is her house and it's debt.

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

Call it a day Harry and visit a Wetherspoons, plenty of people there to while away an hour or two. Shame things haven't worked out but as we all know some people cant be helped.

Whilst I manage perfectly fine on my own, I not a loaner, I do like having some company in the place - besides, the place is too big to manage alone, even if it's just someone to foot a ladder, or pass a hammer.

 

[Dork Lard]

Whilst I manage perfectly fine on my own, I not a loaner, I do like having some company in the place - besides, the place is too big to manage alone, even if it's just someone to foot a ladder, or pass a hammer.

Why do you attach conditions to anyone wanting to "move in"?

I think you need to sit down & have a talk with yourself, define your motives & understand what it is you really want from a relationship.

 

[Notch7]

even if it's just someone to foot a ladder, or pass a hammer

You old romantic

 

[Notch7]

I thought I would just let you all know, that yesterday my relationship with the Filipina widow, has finally hit the buffers after 10 months, due to differences between us - which we are unable to resolve.

She lives alone, working in a low paid job, really struggling valiantly to pay her bills and mortgage. Her husband gambled away half the value of the house, before he died, leaving her in a total financial mess, which she can never manage to repay in her working life. If the house is ever sold, much of the amount realised would immediately go to creditors in Charges against the property.

I suggested the easy way out for her, was to simply move here, sell up, pay the debts off and live happily ever after. Problem is, she will not let go of the house with all of its problems and make a fresh start. She would then end up with my home when I'm gone. She is really struggling to an incredible extent at the moment, just to survive, but she wants to come and live with me, but also keep her own house and all the debt surrounding it. There have been two attempts to repossess. Obviously, I don't want to spend the rest of my life, watching her struggle financially here.

Discussion has bounced from selling, to here renting her house out, but she has absolutely no funds at all, to finance her doing that, nor any funds to cover for even the slightest hiccup should anything at all go wrong. At best, the rental would cover her monthly mortgage, still leaving her with lots of interest to pay on other loans, plus the property is too far from here for her to easily manage.

Yesterday, I put it to her that she had to sell up, pay the debts, and make the move - or we would be best saying bye, bye. She refused, so we have had to part, her very, very upset.

Did she live in the house many years.

maybe she just can’t let go of what it once meant.

 

[Notch7]

Ultimatums never have a successful outcome.

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

Did she live in the house many years.

maybe she just can’t let go of what it once meant.

That has been here argument - 23 years, and lots of bad memories, as well as it being a massive millstone around her neck.

Ultimatums never have a successful outcome. Sometimes, an ultimatum is the only way to make progress.

 

[Old Salt]

Whilst I manage perfectly fine on my own, I not a loaner, I do like having some company in the place - besides, the place is too big to manage alone, even if it's just someone to foot a ladder, or pass a hammer.

You need an apprentice then like Alan Sugar or a goffer

 

[conny]

Sorry to hear this Harry, but as I've said before, don't go looking for 'happiness', it will find you when the time is right.

 

[Koolpc]

Maybe she was frightened by you walking around in stockings and high heels?

On a serious note, i hope things work out for you. Maybe things will resolve in a way where you can both get back together.

 

[diy_fun_uk]

Whilst I manage perfectly fine on my own, I not a loaner, I do like having some company in the place - besides, the place is too big to manage alone, even if it's just someone to foot a ladder, or pass a hammer.

Downsize?

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

Downsize?

Not for me, I've put my heart and soul into this house over the past forty years, getting it just the way I want it, it just seems rude not to share it.

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

Maybe she was frightened by you walking around in stockings and high heels?

Not at all, she appeared quite jealous of my shapely legs..