Shootinating burglarizers

[Softus]

If I found a burglar in my house I would offer him tea and cakes, and have a nice chinwag about how he embarked on a life of crime.

What would you do?

 

[nickso]

tell him to nick the TV cos its ****e and i want a new one, then roll over and go back to sleep. thats assuming that i'd wake up at all, which i wouldn't.

 

[securespark]

Depends, joe. On what he was carrying at the time.

 

[Softus]

What if he was a she, and was carrying your child?

Or if he was Kenneth Williams, and was Carrying On Up The Kyber?

 

[nickso]

What if he was a she, and was carrying your child?

you have already shot (in) her then.

 

[gcol]

Seeing as though you're offering a one on one consultation service, I'd send him round to your house.

 

[Softus]

I never touched her, Your Honour; it wuz securespark.