The parting of the ways

[Notch7]

and before some smart arze says....no I do not speak from experience

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

Did you start talking to her after Wendy left or before? If I were you, I'd swerve that. There's a saying that there's no fool like an old fool.......

No, I 'prepared the ground' so to speak. Swerve it why? I'm a wily old b+gg+r, no one pulls a fast one on me I am far to careful. You listen to their stories, their background, you throw the odd curve ball, you listen for inconsistencies, there have been absolutely none. I've made it clear I will be expecting her to contribute her share to the general running costs.

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

be very very careful with online dating sites -you might find an attractive Fillipino woman in her 50s turns out to be a 23 year old Nigerian man

She doesn't sound like a fella

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

In the main, I think most women would just like somebody who they can rely on and who won't go cheating on them.

I would never dream of cheating on a woman.

The first Mrs Secure was brought up by her alcoholic father who tortured her with beatings and sleep deprival. I loved her dearly and wanted to take her away from all that and "save her". She was violent towards me and I now see she wanted me to hit her back, but I refused. I drew the line at holding her at arm's length.
One day she kicked me down the stairs. I got up, walked out and never went back. 7 years later, I was driving home from work when I heard on the radio that she had been found murdered in her flat and her boyfriend had handed himself in. She was 32. I didn't know where she lived at the time, but in a really strange twist, that news article came on just as I drove past the street she lived on.

There is something similar is Wendy's background, which might help explain some of the rather strange behaviour.

 

[securespark]

Is Wendy Scottish?

Moira was.

 

[The Samaritan]

It's nice to see regulars giving their support to another member in a situation like this.
Thank you all for showing your support to the OP as I'm sure he has found it comforting, hoepfully.

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

Is Wendy Scottish?

Moira was.

Very Scottish.

 

[conny]

Harry, sorry to hear this and sincerely hope you are ok. One thing I would ask/advise is that you don't go rushing into a new relationship. You may be a 'willy old b*gg*r' but there are some people who are top experts at deception. They literally live their lives like actors who play the same role day in and day out. They have said the same lines so many times to so many people they actually believe their own lies.
Take some time for yourself. Find your feet and enjoy the company of your dog but keep active. If you used to go to the pub for a pint once a week before you met Wendy start going again. Pick up a hobby you may have dropped, re-arrange your home to the way YOU want it without having to consider someone else. Trawling the internet looking for companionship is fraught with danger. I'm not saying it can't be safe, it can. But you have to be certain that anyone you meet is the genuine person they purport to be.
Case in point. After I started divorcing my ex I had an incident at work, (was out on a site job and then did a lot of driving around picking up stuff and on the way to another site I fell asleep at the wheel of a 3 ton HIAB wagon), I knew it was time to take a break and get away for a few days. Came over to East Anglia and stayed the weekend with a mate. Two weeks later I came back for a proper 'holiday' and he introduced ne to a very good friend of is and we hit it off immediately. Long story short, we saw a lot of each other during my stay but mainly on a business footing and we kept in touch via the internet. We were honest with each other from the start and I gave her all my details and told her to check me out, (she is involved in the security business), which she did. She also explained what services I could use to check her out but I never bothered as my mate vouched for her. Neither of us were looking for love as we had both just come out of long standing marriages but the inevitable happened and we have been married 5 years this year, (known each other for 9 years so didn't rush into it).
I think what I am trying to say is, if there is someone out there you 'should' be with then fate will play its hand when the time is right.
Take care Harry and don't neglect yourself or your health. Keep posting.

 

[Hairymelon]

She doesn't sound like a fella

I had a friend in a similar situation who invited over an oriental woman who he liked the look of. However , when she arrived he said she was larger than here out of date pictures , not “miss Saigon” more like miss pie gone

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

I had a friend in a similar situation who invited over an oriental woman who he liked the look of. However , when she arrived he said she was larger than here out of date pictures , not “miss Saigon” more like miss pie gone

I have never gone for the miss Saigon type, ever. It is her pushing for video calls, me reluctant. Me pushing to meet up, her reluctant until she know me better.

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

If you used to go to the pub for a pint once a week before you met Wendy start going again.

I started the tidying and reorganising yesterday, just to regain control of my home environment. The pint and a meal is already planned too.

 

[securespark]

Very Scottish.

Moira would yell Scots slang at me and I didnae have a clue what it was. I guessed by the tone of her voice it was not complimentary, though!
And things like, "Haud yer wheesht!"

 

[Bod ...]

be very very careful with online dating sites -you might find an attractive Fillipino woman in her 50s turns out to be a 23 year old Nigerian man

And what's wrong with 23 year old Nigerian men????

 

[Harry Bloomfield]

Moira would yell Scots slang at me and I didnae have a clue what it was. I guessed by the tone of her voice it was not complimentary, though!
And things like, "Haud yer wheesht!"

I had a quite similar problem I got fed up of asking for an English translation.

 

[fillyboy]

A girl I knew at school found me on facebook. Got the friend request and then a few private messages, eventually we swapped phone numbers. She phoned me and suggested we get together and talk about old times.

I said look luv, I'm not a teenager anymore, and to be perfectly honest, I've put on a few pounds in weight since then. She said don't worry, I've put quite a bit of weight on as well, I hung up at that point.