couple of my mates got nicked

B

breezer

As the title suggests a couple of my mates got nicked, they broke into a publishing warhouse to steal calenders, they were sentenced today.


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They got 6 months each
 
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Yeah, it's bank holiday Monday, the courts weren't sitting. :rolleyes:
 
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Thats worse than those who stole calendars from a dating agency office.


Three hundred and sixty five dates each
 
and the dyslexic thieves that ended up with a load of kitchen utensils

colanders.jpg
 
The police haven't anything to go on to find the thieves who stole all the toilets from the police station.
 
This thread got me thinking of ...

Officer: May I see your driver's licence?
Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got caught drink driving.
Officer: May I see the MOT certificate and insurance for this vehicle?
Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.
Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the insurance certificate in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.
Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the boot.
Officer: There's a BODY in the boot?!?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his sergeant. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the sergeant approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Sergeant: Sir, can I see your driving licence?
Driver: Sure. Here it is.
It was valid.

Sergeant: Who's car is this?
Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the logbook, MOT certificate and insurance.
The driver owned the car.

Sergeant: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?
Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it.
Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

Sergeant: Would you mind opening the boot? I was told you said there's a body in it.
Driver: No problem.
Boot is opened; no body.

Sergeant: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a driving licence, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the boot.
Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying git told you I was speeding, too...
 
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