How do you wipe your ass?

How do you wipe your ass?

  • I wipe northwards and I don't feel this needs improvement

    Votes: 2 28.6%
  • I wipe southwards and I don't feel this needs improvement

    Votes: 3 42.9%
  • I do both and I don't feel this needs improvement

    Votes: 2 28.6%
  • I don't wipe much and regularly leave **** on there and I don't care about skidders

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    7
You can't flush wet ones down the loo, as they will catch somewhere and cause a blockage, but Aldi and Asda do flushable wipes - although you're only supposed to do one for each flush???????????????
 
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I agree, don't use flushable wipes, they're not flushable despite what the say. Shared drain with neighbour and they completely blocked the drain at our house. That was a horrible job!

Hawk, if you're getting sore if too many poops, use a barrier cream. Sudocrem, vaseline or anything really in between poops can really help. Learned that trick after taking picolax!
 
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Can you not clean your "ass" with toilet paper? What else is required?

You need water for a thorough clean. No skid marks.

Get a hose attached to a water inlet - gives you a nice fresh feeling after a dump.
 
How many sheets of loo roll should you use per big jobbie? I always fold it over and double up.
 
First can I just say I can't believe I'm talking about botty wiping on an open forum...;)

I double it up. After an incident when I was 11. I will not talk further about it...:eek:

At school, all we had was Izal.:(
 
When Corbyn gets in, he'll provide £10 notes with which "the many" can wipe their arses. Provided by those nasty people who run businesses. Huzzah!

The Unicorns won't be too pleased that the arses/asses/donkeys are getting all the attention though. But at least they can be placated with the free beer. And maybe the asses might provide milk too.

Nozzle
 
Uh-oh. Another thread turned political!!
Quite apt really as all politics is a load of sh*t. :)
 
How come no one has mentioned the very important question of 'Scrunch or fold' ? I find scrunching gets a better 'grip' and a better wipe. Folding uses less paper and is softer but I find it tends to 'spread' rather than clean.
 
How come no one has mentioned the very important question of 'Scrunch or fold' ? I find scrunching gets a better 'grip' and a better wipe. Folding uses less paper and is softer but I find it tends to 'spread' rather than clean.

I remember the "Izal" at school too. Scrunched equaled bloodshed. Folded equaled a rather "rendered" finish :ROFLMAO:
 
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